Good morning!

Star Wars alarm goes off, it is 4 a.m.
Husband gets up to go to work.
Twin 1& 2 have managed to slither into the "Big Bed". Again. Another reminder of how poor my parenting skills are. It is only 4:05.
2 hours later.
"Mama, wake up!". That beautifull smile x 2. I am really am lucky...To think that I don't like staying at home with these amazing sons of mine.
Right then, Twin 1 steals Twin's 2's Thomas the Train. The one that when you push a button it goes on and on and on "Hi! I'm Thomas! I'm a usefull train!". Hate that thing. For one, he really isn't freakin usefull at all and makes my life hell everyday because one twin loses his and then steals the other's. Like right now. It is 6:05.
Get up, walk over to the coffee pot. "Heellloooo Lover!".
Crash.
Twin 1 has managed to get one of the ornaments off. Please, please, please let it not be one of Big Daddy's pre-twins Hallmark ornaments. Opus, The Grinch, Charlie Brown...We have them all.
Phew...It was only a breakable shiny one...No casualties, vacuum, kiss Twin 1& 2 because my witch teeth came out and yelled.
It is 6:20.
So far, I suck as a parent as the boys manage to sleep with us, clearly they don't get "no" as they are yanking the ornaments off the tree which is a direct reflection of my parenting skills and I have already yelled before my first cup of coffee.
Turn TV on, oh good it is Arthur. He is calm.
Pour cup of coffee, sit down on the couch with twins.
The next 10 minutes are pure bliss. Thanks PBS.
Now, time to pack the lunches, write in communication book and get boys ready for preschool.
Have made toast, offered cereal, and a banana. Nope, they don't want to eat...When did my kids become like "those" kids who never want to eat anymore unless it comes in a bright red and yellow cardboard box?
Oh right..Maybe because we go there at least once a week, sometimes twice...Umm...Maybe that's whay I can't lose my baby weight either.
Finish packing the lunches and writting the notes.
Time for me and the boys to get dressed.
Both Twin 1 & 2 wave "no" and begin the "No school bus mommy, no school today"...Are you kidding me? Isn't this suppose to start in like 10 years?
The truth is I was more than prepared for difficult teens who sneak away during school hours and do stupid stuff...I wasn't prepared for toddlers acting like THIS so soon!
Ok, must be creative here.
There is 20 minutes left until we have to be at the bus stop.
Flip the channels again, ahhh CBC Kids, Saumon! And then Georges, woohooo!
Let's Get Ready to Rumble!
Dress Twin 1 &2 following an invisible task anyalysis any ABA specialist would be very proud of...First, the shirt, then the underwear, then socks, then pants, then snowpants (do not fasten right away) then snowboots quickly, then fasten the snowpants....All the while wrestling with Mad Dog Vachon Jr. Phew...Didn't even break a sweat!
Round Two.
Byt the time I am halfway done with Mad Dog II , Twin 1 is almost out of his snowpants...SHIT! Point and scream. It works.
Only I have broken my promise not to yell anymore again. Great.
Ok, now hats, jackets and mittens are on and we are exiting the building with our backpacks on.
Time is ticking.
We have 5 minutes left to be at the end of the street.
Twin 1 wants to eat the snow off the front steps while Twin 2 decides to run down the driveway and slips. Not hurt. but crying because his face is full of snow. "No Running!" Screaming again.
"Common Twin 1, All done eating snow!". More screaming.
Walk hand in hand with both twins. "Look Mama, the birds are flying!"
Yes they are little boys, Ahhh I really am lucky afterall...
"No hands!"
"Yes, hands Twin 1, this is the street we have to hold hands!"
Twin II manages to get away and runs.
"No running I said!"
Wave to neighboor and smile....Just smile and wave.
Catch up with the twins, scream more.
Finally get to the bus stop..."Mama, have to go pipi!"
"You are going to have to wait until school"
"No school! no school bus!"
Wait 10 minutes, the bus is late. Fanstastic.
Bus finally arrives, twins flop to the ground and I trip. OMG Is it too early to drink? It must be happy f-in hour somewhere!
Manage to get both boys on the bus, wave and kiss goodbye. Joy.
Skip back home while singing U2's "Beautifull day"!
Gte home, have a sip of coffee finally. It's cold.
But...Today is a preschool day which means I can nuke it!
Ahhhh...It's a beautifull day indeed.

A bientot,
xoxo

"Something Special"

When you are a parent of children with special needs...
You continuously try to find the missing piece of the puzzle...Did I do "something" or get exposed to something I wasn't suppose to when I was pregnant?
You constantly question your parenting and worry...Did I do or say "something" I wasn't suppose to? Am I still doing "something" wrong?
You feel guilty, so guilty, as your children might have "something" but they can walk, breathe on their own and are alive...Not like the parents whose children are unable to function daily as they are so sick or disabled.
You look at pictures over and over again to try to find when "something" started not looking right...
You sigh that you actually thought the first months were so incredibly difficult when in fact it all started getting more difficult when "something" wasn't right...
Whereas once you questioned professionals who reassured you nothing was wrong, you now wish you could believe that "somethings" all fall in to place in time...
Now you cringe thinking of the next appointment in which you want to know if "something" is wrong but fear what it might be...
Your heart wants to rejoice when a close one tells you they are expecting but your head worries that "something" might go wrong...As it did for you.
You feel more and more isolated as the months go by as more and more milestones aren't achieved but get so excited when "something" small improves...
Your resentment, bitterness, anger, anxiety, jealousy and sadness grows inside you...Like "something" is going to burst...
You begin to wonder what birthdays, school days, holidays and special occasions will look like if "something" doesn't change...
Because you are a mom.
You knew "something" wasn't right, and you questioned and pushed and advocated for your children...And already overwhelmed and exhausted so early in the game.
"Somethings" can't be controlled.
"Somethings' can't be changed.
"Somethings" aren't fair.
"Sometings" can't be explained.
Yet,"something" will never stop you from loving your children for who they are...And that is "Something" Special...
xoxo